Bryan Loves You

Seth Landau

Jonathan

Tony Todd

The Narrator

George Wendt

Mr. Flynn

Tiffany Shepis

Cindy

Daniel Roebuck

Professor Spine

Chuck Williams

Sheridan

Brinke Stevens

Evil Nurse

Lloyd Kaufman

Jonathan's Helper

Jeff Dylan Graham

Josh

Candy Stanton

Nicole

Tori King

Linda

Bobby Slayton

Interviewer